Fourword
Spinning their goddamn yarns.
Itchy Pricks
King Charles The Turd is an inbred child molesting poofter. Oh wait, that one has already been done. Too bad that Yours Punctuation Butcher Truly has run out of White-Out – heaven knows it is best to be rid of unnecessary caucasian obscenities.
Donald J. Trump has been compromisingly caught on video balls-deep (not very deep at all) in multiple underaged human beings (and possibly reptiles). Come to think of it, that one has already been done too. Too bad that Yours Punctuation Butcher Truly has run out of White-Out – heaven knows it is best to be rid of unnecessary caucasian obscenities.
Best Buds Planning WWIII & Skikamarink A Dink A Dinky Doing Some Minors
Oh well, looks like it will have to be a work of fiction this time ‘round. And Y’all know what they say about fiction, right? Fiction – it is two letters away from being diction. So, time to diction with the fiction:
What a gosh-darn home-wrecker that inconsiderate architectural-wonder-deconstructor be. Such foundational upheaval spanning the divide, a veritable vortex of vagary vicissitudes he brought, braggingly, concise, measured none the less in such withdrawn instrument destruction. And as such, always spread thin, entrapment from within, what a device for the taking of the unsuspecting victim – tear ‘em on down, tear ‘em on down he thought relishingly, and then he did – tear ‘em on down that is. Oh, the matrix would have something to say about such behaviour – karmic retribution perhaps, say, fanged longitudinally in latitudinal dispersement? Ah, they speak not – or perhaps in many not so words upon the web they do so say?
Yes! That itch, that itch, oh how it is a bitch! But enough to change his measuredly calculatingly wicked ways? Fuck No! He don’t want to involuntarily wear it anymore. Those spatial facials, skin crawling accompaniment – tear ‘em on down! Bluh, retreat, retreat, retreat – salve, salve, salvation? Oh, how it is a bitch, those little pricks! That dermal squirm, his to learn, no taciturn, for relief doth yearn.
Oh, but to hold in suspense is such a scene, but upon what offence does he categorically preen? No, unlike King Charles and Trump it is not venereal diseased teen – nor their unrelenting penchant to privately act and dress like closeted fanatical queens, nor join forces and attempt to blow those Russkies to Smithereens! No more, no more, you cannot take it, such alphabetical nonsense, oh how does he make It? Delirium of course, it has set in – those little fucking pricks they pierced his shin. And let him assure thee, that chemical compound is not LSD!
For you must see, in spring and summertime the spiderwebs be. So at work every morning as he walked down the paths, he wielded drawn tape measure and created spiderweb swaths. And with those arachnids the word got around, “Let’s get that motherfucker on his stomping ground!” So one night after slumber had nicely set in, they sent out Big Momma to chomp on his shin. Oh, that itch, that itch, oh how it is a bitch! Beyond temptation, he attempted not to scratch, but what amazed him the most was that around the wounds there was now a hairless patch. Upon which he wondered of possible revelation, could such toxin compete with laser hair removal negation? One treatment in area and all his hair went away, so who needs eight treatments and each time to pay!?
Yours Offended By The Alphabet Creator Truly was planning on tying the above article in with a bunch of them High-Horse Fuck-Faced liars that change the rules in the middle of a game and enjoy existentially gang-raping little folk like me for amusement. Pathetic fucks that they are. However, my interest in writing longer articles has waned, since my readership are just undeserving corn-bred chickenshits.
That being said, another day there will be an article entitled: How Gay Are They? And trust me they are fucking gay, literally, for self promotion. It will be a who’s who of veritable non-fiction comedic platinum draped upon Unpolished Brass, Private Sector Pansies and, Gangbanger Enthusiasts. Gay for pay, yes – but they’d do it for free!